Well needless to say, I go to  East Hartford High School. Today was my first day and, it’s not over yet. Im here typing this in my “Introduction to Microsoft Word” class which is basically Keyboarding all over again, with a fancier name.

Anyway, today started off with me thinking that I missed the bus. Luckily I didnt. The bus stop in the morning is pretty much like my old one, people sprawled out along the street, no on really standing at the corner. It’s less crowded though.

The school looks sooo fancy from the outside. Like one of those schools you see on the TV, all fake, with no substance. Quite frankly, from what I’ve seen so far, that’s how some of the people are here.

I found the gudiance affice, no thanks to some teachers who gave me faulty directions. I waited for my guidance counselor. She took about 55 years to come, but she did. We waited for, literally, 15-20 minutes for my guide to show up, but she didnt so my guidance counselor took me to my first class. Then a girl in my first class, AP Economics, walked me to my second class, British Literature, that she had with me. She seemed really fake about life, but maybe she is a good person.

Then I had geometry. My geometry teacher is pretty cool, down to earth. I could get along with him well. He was saying that I should be in his AP Stats class. I was like “No thanks”. lol I know my limits. Ofcourse they but me in the lowest math classes possible, but hey, it’s an easy “A”.

D period came around and I had lunch. I found Carolyn in my lunch. I had no idea that she moved here. But before I sat down I had to get an ID. I was surprised at how fast my picture was taken and a few seconds later I had 2 IDs printed out for me and 2 IDs that were sent to my house. I came back and sat with Carolyn, but I didnt buy lunch, mostly because I didnt have money. Lunch

My Algebra I teacher is pretty condesending. I can sort of see where he is coming from, some of the students are really slow, but still, there is no need to talk down to everyone in that class. But whatever, pIm pobably gonna change hat class anywa.

Study was cool. Quanza is in it, she’s really nice. She use to go to NBHS.

“Intro to Microsoft Word”. Gay, Gay, Gay, and not the gay that I like.

Gym is OK. I think Im gonna like it. IT’s not as bad as I thought it would be. It’s not as bad as middle school gym, that was humiliating.

My life is a mess right now.

My mother bought a house in East Hartford. Im happy that she finally has a house, but why now? Why my senior year?!! I cant just up and leave and not finish what I started…

Every year of high school I lived in a new place. We’ve barely stayed in one house for a year. I cant deal with all the moving. Especially not now. This is my senior year. I’ve worked so hard to get this far. I’m currently meeting my school’s standards. I cant just move to a new school and change everything and have me end up having to re-do things I have already done or not be able to graduate with my class. I cannot and will not have that.

I wouldnt have mind that much if it was during or after sophomore year. Atleast i could have braced myself for that, been able to adapt.  Not now, not after 10 years.

Part of me knows it’s just the fact that Im leaving NB and the other part of me knows its the fact that I will loose some of my friends. Part of me wants to see East Hartford. Another part knows that I have to finish school here, to go this prom, graduate from this school or it wont be the same.

WHy now?!!!

Im so upset that my mom didn’t even seem to factor me or my brother into the equation, well maybe my brother but certainly not me. Her main reason for moving is the fact that East Hartford is closer to her job than the town we live in now is. Also that it would be easier to put my brother onto the bus in the morning.

That’s not a good enough reason for me to go, leave this all behind. I cannot, I will not. I refuse.

I told my mom twice how much I didn’t want to leave, both times I started crying. That last time, which was on Saturday, she told me how she really felt. I started arguing with her about how this is changing my life. Then she asks me if I want to move or not, after the fact, after everything is said, done, and paid for. WTF?!!!! It’s ridiculous. Anyway, we still kept arguing. Then she pulled her “Well if you dont like it you can get the fuck out and live with someone else routine!”, but this time was different, she talked about emancipating me and telling me not to come so that I could “be out of her life” and she could be out of mine. This time I really took a look at everything.

I dont want to leave NB and I really need to stay here. I think it will be better for me. I need to stay here, without my mom. Im sure that if I move with her to East Hartford things will only get worse for our bad relationship. I hope that my mom will give my monthly child support to me so I could give it to the person I hope I will be staying with.

I have to know tonight.

I will be 17 on Decmeber 5th. It’s quie a while away, I know.  My 16th year of life has been one of the craziest so far. The summer of o8 is def one for the record books. I have experimented with sooo many things, done things I thought I never would do, but I enjoyed every single minute of it. I wouldn’t change anything that has happened so far. Each thing I do has some kind of lesson to be learned behind it. School is coming up and I have yet to even attemp to do my community service nor my summmer assignments. Im more worried about the communtity service though. I still dont have a job. I really need one though. I wanna start saving for college and for an epiphany trip my friends and I are planning.  I also want to change my personal style. Not my personality becuase, with all honesty, that is my best feature. I want the physical to finally connect with the mental. I want to revamp Nerdtorious, probably get a new domain name. I think I’ve outgrown this one a little. IDK. I’ll get back to you on that.

I have been working on this layout all day, since I woke up at 9 this morning. I have been so frustrated, mostly because my computer wont do anything I want it to. I still have to fix a few things. I haven’t wrote a blog in over a month. Most of the people who use to read my blogs stopped coming because a) I rarely blogged and b) their comments kept going to spam (and getting deleted without my knowledge). I really need to sit down and just post my thoughts. I have so much stuff that I want to share with everyone. I need to learn how to manage my time so I can be able to do all the things I need and want to do. Well, I have to go restart my computer (for the 5th time). I’ll post something soon (I promise), bye.