This weekend, Friday to be exact, I hung out with my friends Brittany, Tiffany, and Amanda. We went to see the football game in Newington. We (New Britain High) played again Newington High and of course Newington got their asses handed to them, being defeated 20 - 17. I was kinda disappointed because NB was playing so damn sloppy, we could have owned them big time if our players were actually making an effort. But that’s besides the point…

Brittany and Tiffany’s mom made the usual cookies for the football team. All the boys live to eat those cookies. I have to say, the first time I ate them I amost made myself sick on them. Once I had one I just couldnt stop eating them. LOL We waited for the players after the game at NBHS and gave them out. Boys were sneaking out during their after game meeting just to get the cookies first. It was quite entertaining.  Ha ha. After that I hung out at Tiff’s house for a little while longer and then went home.

Today is my Friend Barbara’s Bday. I think I missed her party yesterday. Im not sure. Today I was going to go to her house and chill with her, but her phone is off again and she isnt on myspace to send her a message. I think Im going to stay home. I didnt have a present for her anyway. :(  Besides I have a lot of things to do today, like finish an essay that I should have done in the summer.

Recently I’ve been feeling really down on myself. I’ve also noticed that I have been eating like a fat pig. Nothing seems to satisfy my hunger anymore. I dont know what to do. I feel so self-concious, it’s rediculous. Every little thing I do, say, or wear is being scrutanized, by me! I just dont feel good about myself. I feel like I cant compete with all these other girls, why boys only call me if they want something, and why im still not anyone’s girl. I think I need to really buckle down and lose some weight. I lost about 12 pounds in the summer, but Its not enough. I dont want to be stick thin, just smaller.